Saying the unspeakable

One of the keys to doing anything successfully with other people in this world is good communication. This has become harder and harder over the years, with the rise of the MBAs and the corporatization of virtually all human activities.

Few things represent this managerial regime better than the acronym- allegedly a tool for efficiency but in reality a meta-level of jargon, more often used to exclude people from divining meaning than to enhance group understanding of anything at all.

Like so many weapons of control, this has often been subverted by those it was meant to contain and nowhere more effectively than among those serving in the armed forces...

Should you ever find yourself in Iraq or Afghanistan, these may help you make a new friend...

Miltary acronyms

ACE: Ask Chief Everything!

ARMY: Arn't Ready to be Marines Yet!

ARMY: AF Rejected Me Yesterday

BOHICA: Bend Over, Here It Comes Again!

BOSS: Being On Ships Sucks!

BUFF: Big Ugly ****in' Forklift!

CRS: Can't Remember ****!

****: Cilvilan under navel Training

CYA: Cover Your Ass!

DEH: Don't Expect Help!

DICK: Dedicated Infantry Combat Killer.

DILLIGAF: Does it look like I give a ****!

EUSTIS: Even Uncle Sam Thinks It Sucks!

F.A.R.T.: Flatulent Airborne Reaction Team

FIDO: **** It, Drive On!

FIFO: Fit In or **** Off!

FIGMO: **** It, Got My Orders!

FILTAB: **** it, let's take a break!

FLIF: Falkland Islands Laundry Facility

FNG: ****in' New Guy!

FRED: ****ing Retard Extra Dumb.

FT EUSTIS: **** This, Even Uncle Sam Thinks It Sucks!

FTA: **** The Army!

FUBAR: ****ed Up Beyond All Repair!

FUBAR: ****ed Up Beyond Any Recognition

G2G: Good To Go!

HMFIC: Head Mother ****er In Charge.

HUOA: Head Up Ones Ass!

I&I: Intoxication and Intercourse.

KMD: Kiss My Dick!

LGH: Let's Go Home!

LLMF: Lost Like a Mother ****er.

LOST: Looking Over Strange Terrain.

MARINE: Muscles Are Required Intelligence Not Essential

MARINES: Many Americans Running Into Never Ending ****

MARINES: My Ass Rides In Navy Equipment, Sir!

MRE: Meals Rejected by Ethiopians!

MRE: Meals Rejected by the Enemy!

NAVY: Never Again Volunteer Yourself!

NAVY: Need Any Vaseline Yet?

NBC: No Body Cares!

NCO: No Chance Outside

OMGIF: Oh My God, I'm ****ed.

PENIS: Pointless Exercise Not Involving Soldiers.

PFC: Proud ****in' Civilian!

S&E: Salute 'N Execute!

S&G: ****s 'N Giggles!

****: Special High Intensity Training!

SNAFU: Situation Normal, All ****ed Up!

SONFI: Switched Off Not ****ing Interested

SPFO: Some Place ****ing Off!

SWAG: Scientific Wild Ass Guess!

TARFU: Things Are Really ****ed Up.

TEWT: Training Exercise Without Troops.

TURD: Trainee Under Rigid Discipline.

USARMY: Uncle Sam Ain't Released Me Yet! Backwards: Yes My Retarded Ass Signed Up

USARMY: Used, Screwed, And Released My Ass, Yep

USCG: Uncle Sam's Confused Group

USMC: Uncle Sams Misguided Childern

USMC: Unlimited **** Mass Confusion

USMC: U Suckers Missed Christmas

USMC: Urine Samples Make Civilians

USAF: U Suckers Are Fairies

YMRASU: Yes My Retarded Ass Signed Up!  


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