"Dum-de-dum, hey, nonny noh, dum-diddy-dum-diddy-dum-dum-dum".
It was a happy day in heaven, but then, most days in heaven were happy ones. Sometimes things would get a little dark, but then he would usually black out and when he came to, the sun would be shining and some simple melody would warble through his thoughts again.
He loved these little melodies. He could sing them over and over, sometimes for what you or I might think was a million years, but to him was not even the blink of an eye.
"Here you go" he said, tilting the watering can, "free water, free water, dum-de-dum-de-dum". The fresh clear water sparkled down onto the blue-green ball and he stared, transfixed as ever by the beauty of the light and the water.
Then the voices started inside his head.
It sounded like people were freaking out, and it hurt his ears. It felt like a power drill drilling into the back of his head, and it didn't make any sense. He put the watering can down, so he could put a finger in each of his ears.
"Dum-De-Dum" he sang more loudly than before, "Hey Nonny Noh, Dum de DUM!".
He walked away, singing as loudly as he could until it was quiet in his head again.
He didn't know who was who was freaking out, or why, or who this "God" was they wanted. He didn't know about any "floods", or "catastrophes" or "disasters" and anyway, his name was Norbert.