Yogi Bear... the Horror

As a dog returns to his vomit,
so a fool returns to his folly.

Proverbs 26:11

... so i'm just having a cup of tea
and watching TV with my mom,
minding my own business when this
commercial comes on for a new movie...

it's 2010 and there's a new movie
about Yogi Bear?


dear god, please let this bomb. please...

...leaving aside the memory of Daws Butler,
and the fact that i don't want to hear Justin Timberlake sing, let alone "do" Yogi's
little buddy Boo Boo,

and never mind that it really doesn't look
like the imaging here is setting a new high
water mark for the industry...

my sense is that unless this bombs out,
i feel like it's the beginning of the exhumation
and re-animation of the otherwise immaculate corpses of every cartoon i ever watched
on Saturday morning.

this thought makes me want
to blow my cookies.

it was bad enough a few years back
when that wave of necrophiliac recordings
came out- all these people singing
'with' dead people.

that creeped me out big time, but at least
they didn't do saturation marketing
on TV, with merchandising tie-ins to other companies who also do saturation advertising...

the thought of more and more childhood memories coming back from the grave, yelling and screaming like rabid harpies on bad meth is disturbing
in the extreme...

aren't there any good ideas around
for a new computer-animated movie?

did i miss
some great public outcry
for "more Yogi" now?

was it even all that great to begin to with?

it's not like i believe these things are sacred
or anything. i'm just getting sick of the endlessly strip-mining of the media, by the media,
for the media.

in the natural world, this sort of cannibalism
leads to the development of what
we call "mad cow disease".

i may need to get my meds adjusted.



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